Monday, February 23, 2009

Pen Meets Paper Feb 23 '09

Pen Meets Paper
Opinion by Helge Nome
The Stelmach government in Alberta is relying on the apathy of local people for a money grab with historical precedents unbeknown to this writer. Premier Ed Stelmach (“Honest Eddie”) has pledged $2billion to develop carbon sequestration technology to save the planet from ecological destruction. In comparison, the Federal government has pledged $1billion and the US government is kicking in $3billion. In order to gain a sense opf proportion, Alberta currently has 3.3million people living within its borders, Canada has 33million souls and the US lays claim to 306million bipods (excluding chickens and such).
So my message to Honest Eddie goes as follows:
“Hey, Ed it must feel good to set yourself up as the saviour of the world by mortgaging the lives of present and future Albertans so that your friendly oil and gas company buddies can pat you on the back and make you feel important. Seeing yourself as a major player on the World Stage must be a real buzz! And now you are going to borrow the money, on our behalf, from your banking buddies at interest plus principal repayable.
Eddie, do you know how these buddies of yours find the money to lend to you? I'm sure you know but wouldn't like anyone else to know so I'll tell'em: They make it up. Just like that! Plug a number into a computer program and, voila!, your money is there for you. Who says there is no magic in this world?
So as you can see, Eddie, you have excelled in your duty to your masters and will no doubt be rewarded with a comfortable board appointment, or two, at the end of your natural political life. By that time your employers will likely have somebody lined up to take your place and hopefully continue the work of making Alberta America's energy mining pit at the expense of Albertans.”